1. Wayne R.
Being a somewhat-appreciated associate at Crap-Mart, Wayne starts his morning when his alarm goes off at 7:30 AM. After hitting the snooze button three times, he scrambles out of bed at 8:05, dresses in whatever clothes have been left on the floor, splashes water on his face, and hurries to work. He picks up a danish and a coffee at the gas station and usually arrives at work somewhat awake and only slightly late.
2. Rebecca C.
Rebecca starts her day each morning somewhere between 5 and 8 AM, depending on when her 4-year-old decides to wake her up, usually by screaming. She always makes time for herself by locking the bathroom door and telling her kids “I swear to god, if you bother me in the next ten minutes, i will sell you to an orphanage!” Then it’s a crazy circus of getting each child dressed and ready for school or day care before calling her boss to tell him that she’ll be “a little bit late” again today.
3. Oscar N.
Oscar begins his day by carefully folding up the box that he lives in and tucking it behind a broken fence so that no one will steal it. He spends twenty minutes in deep thought, composing the sign that he will hold at the freeway exit ramp, enticing passersby to contribute to his savings. Oscar usually skips breakfast, feeling that the hunger he feels will propel him toward success.
4. Jolene K.
The day doesn’t start for Jolene until the first bong hit of the morning, usually around 11 AM. After that she contemplates life and the universe until she gets the munchies and eats whatever leftovers she can find in the fridge. Her morning workout follows, which consists of running down the stairs of her apartment building, forgetting something, running back up, forgetting what she forgot, running down again, and so on.
5. Buster A.
Buster gets up each morning at dawn and does a sun salutation. He then meditates until the cell doors open and breakfast is served in the mess hall. He’s vary careful about what he eats, opting for “whatever they slop on my tray.” After breakfast, he wanders the yard, honing his observationals skills so that he doesn’t get shivved.
6. Cameron B.
Cameron’s day begins earlier than most—at 3:30 AM. He eats a bowl of cereal, packs a lunch, then begins his daily workout—a three-mile hike to the nearest bus station. He takes the time to re-read all of the same advertisements on the busses that bring him to his job by 7 AM, then delights in the repetitive monotony of stamping out decorative coasters from recycled tin for his 9-hour shift.
7. Odelia P.
Odelia begins her day at noon by rinsing the stench of vomit from her mouth. She eats a liesurely breakfast of three cigarettes and half a liter of flat soda before showering the smell of sweat and failure from her body. By 4 PM she’s ready to work another night, waiting for the high to kick in.
8. Nancy F.
Living in a rural area, Nancy starts her day before dawn, preparing breakfast for her husband. She takes care to set the table exactly right and cook the eggs exactly right and pour just exactly the right amount of coffee for him. She works her mind and body throughout the morning, staying tense and alert in case she does something slightly wrong and that rat-bastard beats her again. She gives thanks every morning that he hasn’t killed her when he goes off to cheat on her with her sister.
9. Norman T.
Norman’s morning routine consists of a long run. He generally foregoes breakfast unless he can forage a meal from an untended dumpster. Running keeps his mind focused and keep the forces that torment him at bay, whether that’s the demons in his head or the F.B.I., who have been tracking him for weeks.
10. Boswell Q.
A day without conquest is a day misspent, in Boswell’s mind. The first thing he likes to do when he wakes up is have all of his harem girls enslaved. Then a quick bloody takeover of whatever town displeases him follows. After that, he takes some “me” time to enjoy the spoils of war while those who opposed him are publicly executed in brutal fashions.
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